Behind these eyes, one finds only darkness...

...THESE ARE THE EYES OF A PSYCHOPATH

This Halloween, along with the usual serving of the next Saw movie, we have yet another remake of a classic horror. John Carpenters 'Halloween' has been remade. Before you start groaning and rolling the eyes at yet another remake (although a lot of horror remakes have been surprisingly good, see 'Hills Have Eyes' and 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre'), this film is being made by Rob Zombie, bringer of the gems 'House of 1000 Corpses' and 'The Devils Rejects'. Now these movies may not be the most brilliantly directed, and some of the scenes are over long and disjointed, but they are as gory and scare-filled as you like, so check out this trailer and have a bit of a look-see:

Halloween Trailer

Day off

Ahhh, a day off work. Not that I was meant to have a work free day, but I gave away my shift because I am sick of being in that place. All the bloody time. Although, truth be told, I had to take off today to go and pay bills and rent and everything. So it isn't going to be the most fun-filled day ever. "Here you are, nice people, take over half of all the money I have in the world. I don't mind." Bastards, if you pardon the language.

Anyway, my day should be filled with lots of doing stuff, and journeying far and wide. But I will probably sit on the computer for most of it before I realise that time is almost up for bill paying, and then a quick run into town followed by a celebratory beer. Then get up tomorrow for work. Always the case.

But for now, as I start the 'sitting idly by the computer' phase, I will listen to some country/folk music on Pandora whilst waiting for Peter to come online for a game of checkers.

Champions League Final

Well, the Champions league final has now come to pass and it was a far better game than the FA cup final. Although it still wasn't the best game ever, and the wrong team won (depending on your persuasions), we did see a good spectacle and the atmosphere in the pub was magnificent. Lots of singing and wot-not. I'm sure that Liverpool fans such as Robbie and Pete will love this pick of Inzaghi putting the ball into the back of the net.

I could go into an in-depth match analysis, covering all the errors made by Liverpool, especially the tactical mistakes by Benitez, but this will all be covered by your daily broadsheet (see also broadsheets in tabloid form). Instead, this next photo will shed a little bit of light on AC Milan using Divine guidance to get their win:

(Kaka is about to be taken up)

So football over for another year? Not quite, there are still the playoff finals to come! Hurrah!

Come back Football, all is forgiven...

Lets not beat around it: the FA cup final was an abomination in terms of football. Here we had two of the top teams in England that should have been battling it out in arguably the finest cup competition in the world, featuring players with great football talent (and Darren Fletcher) who get paid an obscene amount of money. A classic encounter we could have had. What we did have was something that could be likened to a wet fart on a drizzly day, it was that unwelcome. The players looked tired, even though for the last few games of the premiership we were treated to weakened teams and poor excuses ("We've been playing lots of games this season. We need a rest. Can I have my £100,000 weekly pay now?") and once again the media hype led us off to fantasy land before the big day. It was just a relief I was with good friends and beer, otherwise who knows what might have happened; I could have started watching cricket! It would, of course, been a far better game if Blackburn had reached the final instead of the lacklustre Chelsea, which was very nearly the case.

So now, to the final Final. The last big match of the season. AC Milan stepping up against Liverpool in the climax to the Champions League, a repeat of the final two years ago. Another one much hyped, granted, but there is still always the expectation, nay, the hope, of seeing the beautiful game; the sort of breathtaking match that fills your heart with wonder and amazement and makes the most rock steady supporter weep with either joy or despair. If only wars could be settled with games such as these.

In saying that though, there is the danger it could be shite. Lets hope not. In case it is, and the world becomes gloomier because of it, you can be assured that somewhere out in that big ol' world we have the glories of midget basketball.

Lazy Afternoons are Brilliant

Ahhhhh.

After quite a slow 13 hour shift yesterday, I got up this morning and proceeded to do... very little. I was up early enough, 10.30 in the a.m to be exact, and I have bummed around doing as few things as possible. Now, its not that I have done nothing; I have hoovered the front room, made Ally a breakfast of rice and peas and made myself a lovely dinner of spuds and bacon. The rest of the time has been spent playing Resident Evil 4, or locked in a grudge match of Checkers with Peter, whilst Classic FM plays in the background. Delightful.

Its coming to an end though, as I have to go to work at 6. That means having to actually get dressed and walk into town while everybody else is leaving work.

So, apologies for just how boring and useless this post actually is, but I guess I'm trying to avoid the inevitable getting set for work for as long as possible. Plus I needed to add something or else all you people would forget about me.

Anyway, time marches ever on, and so must I.

Same Old Fella, Just a Little Older...

A big big Happy Birthday to me Dad who adds another branch to the tree of life. All the folk in Manchester send their best. I was out yesterday with Mr James Wight, so we were recreating shenanigans that went down a few years ago during Dads 50th; This birthday will probably be a bit more low key than that, but just as grand. Was hunting for some funny/embarrassing/compromising photo to put on this, but couldn't find any, dammit. So. know where I found this? The Q101 website!! Apparently Andy Gordon is still a DJ there.
So once again, Happy Birthday to Andy, not just my Dad, but also best mate. Have a great one. And tell Mum I allow you to have a glass of wine today. Just the one, mind. You know how your head gets...

Bye bye Lawrie

What fate lies in waiting for the greatest national team in the solar system? With Sir Lawrie gone from the helm it will take a talented and charismatic leader to steer the good ship Northern Ireland to victorious waters, that lusted-after land of the European Championships 2008. Jonny Rainey has already kindly offered his services...

GREATEST THING EVER

Today I received something in the post that could quite possibly be in contention for the coveted 'greatest thing ever' title. I have shown this to Peter and Jeni via web cam and they have both come back with the "ooohhhh" reaction. Ladies and Gentlemen, say hello to my little friend...
That's right. Its a chainsaw controller for the PlayStation 2. With genuine fake blood smears and splats and presented in a plastic wooden box. This is what my hard earned money has gone towards. Ain't you proud Mum? (actually, its price was around the £45 mark, but I picked up this fella for £8.99. Nice)
Bedtime now, but I will be dreaming of this little beaut, no doubt. Pleasant dreams folks.

Simon Lives!

Ahh, 'tis been a while since communication was last... um... communicated. But now the blogging shall begin once more. Not that there will be anything of any great importance or interest. And probably nothing remotely noteworthy, but you get what you pay for.

The last few weeks have seen things happen, some good, some not so good, but mostly just work. And when not working, when I could be online updating this oasis of knowledge in an otherwise barren and ignorant dessert known as the Internet (or is that the other way round?), I am more want to be found back on the good ol' PlayStation 2 working my way through Resident Evil 4. Wasting my time? Not really. Its not as if I could be doing something else . And it is a very good game.

Oh, and I got a new phone. Its black and shiny, and flips open. That's about as far as my phone knowledge goes.

Anyway, things to do before work today (when I say 'things', I really mean I'm going to the cinema to watch a movie) so I shall catch all you good people later.

THE RETURN...

There was silence.

For almost a month, nothing.

Not the barest whimper.

But now, something stirs. Something begins to happen.

The people, they come from near and far. The old, the young; the healthy and the infirm, they all come. They can feel it, sense it, almost taste it. It was not unlike electricity, making the hairs at the back of the neck stand on end and the tips of fingernails buzz with anticipation.

He is coming.

There was no telegram, no messenger to spread word of this event. But they all knew. And they gathered at the foot of the great stage, voices kept low but still bursting with excitement, with wonder at what was expected.

The period of absence had been hard, unbearable at times, but it was coming to an end. There was light at the end of the dark, dark tunnel.

Suddenly a hush falls across the mass of peoples. All eyes, every one, look to the stage. Breaths are held, and fists are clenched. The time has arrived. He is about to enter the stage.

And on he walks. There is an audible intake of air from the gathered mass. He marches confidently to the centre of the stage, head held high, back straight and eyes fixed on the future. Simon has returned.

Simon is back on his blog.

There he stands, tall and commanding, a knowing grin on his face and the knowledge that all is again right in the world.

And from the hushed crowd, these silent watchers, one voice is heard. Hardly more than a whisper, but still clear and audible, this one voice rings true and speaks the one question on every ones mind, the one question about the grand figure standing so majestic at centre stage:

"Who the f**k is that...?"